The American Civil War, why?

Recently, there has been chatter about reparations for slavery, which made me look at the Civil War. The short version is this: Americans like Holy Wars, and the Civil War was a prime example of a completely pointless, and extremely destructive conflict fought for purely SJW reasons.

Now, there is endless debate on whether or not the Civil War was really about slavery. Below, we will prove that it was not. First, some facts:

So, ignoring the cost, the equivalent of 1/6 of the total slave population was slaughtered. Imagine, for a second that the slaves were polled, and were given the option of remaining in their dismal condition, or have every sixth person chosen at random) killed so that the rest may be free to practice sharecropping or some such other lucrative occupation. I think we know what the answer would be. Now, consider that for a small fraction of the cost of the war (at most 1/2, but really more like 1/10th) every single slave could be bought and freed.

We are not quite done. Huge fortunes were made on war profiteering in the North (largely by selling substandard food, clothing and armaments to the army), and while there was a draft, a person of reasonable means could hire someone to serve in their stead. So, the rich made money, the poor lost their lives in the North, while the South was completely obliterated. All in the name of Social Justice. Seems pretty familiar, doesn’t it?